Wednesday, June 3

The Secret - Get 100.000+ Followers On Twitter In 24 Hours!

"... Would you like to get 16,000 Followers in 90 days & Make Money doing it?"


Why think so small! If you first want to think really big, you might as well go for it for real. I mean what is 16,000 followers (and in 90 days, come on! Peanuts, man!), even if it is a targeted audience to your personal, or company needs to generate traffic and revenue. Forget all the Twitter Gurus (for a few minutes!), and read carefully the secret to getting (Can't wait! Please, tell me know!)....

Let's be modest and assume on the average for every 10 persons you follow, at least one will follow you (no science involved, just assumption). This means that if you follow one million, you will eventually get 100,000 followers.

However, if you are following 1 million and have 100,000 followers, others with a bit of knowledge would think of you as a wannabe twitter king. So, then learning the game, you will eventually remove those 900,000 that did not follow you. Now it looks better, right! 100,000 Followers versus 100,000 Following. But then you get smarter, and remove 50,000 (or why not 90,000) of those you are following, and trust me they will have no idea, because who keeps track of these kind of things. And swoosh you have 100,000 followers, but you are only following say 10,000 now (Do no Evil!). Now that looks really impressive! Now, you are crowned a Twitter King! Actually, 100.000 followers is not much, so the next step would be to get 1,000.000 million followers. You repeat the 24-hour cycle again and again and again...

Wait a second! Where am I going to find one million people to follow on Twitter. Ashton Kutcher to the rescue! Currently, he has 2 million plus followers (as I write). So, if you speed off to click 2 million times (excluding clicking the 'Next' buttons!), you should expect 200,000 followers within a 24-hour period. Even if you have to wait 2-3 days, I think you will survive. Next, you might go for Oprah (although she is only no. 7 on the top 100 Twitter Counter list), as you might find many new Twitter faces there who are not following Ashton Kutcher.

Wait a minute! How am I going to be able to click 2 million times within a 24-hour period? You need a good broadband connection for sure, and some Bruce Lee kind of chopping skills.

What if I told you that you only need to click a special 'MAGIC BUTTON' once to follow all Ashton Kutcher's followers, or any other person on Twitter you choose. Believe or not, the mastermind (will never reveal who!) behind this tool, is currently working on the ultimate magic button that will enable anyone to click once to follow every single soul on Twitter. Imagine following let's say 10 million people with one click.

Wait an hour! Cool, but how do I remove those people who eventually don't follow me, so that I don't look like a 'Twitter Twit'! Well, what if I told you that there is a 'MAGIC REMOVE BUTTON' that filters and removes all those people who are not following you, and has an amazing fuzzy semantic logic that can also strategically using a cosmetic target marketing feature to remove a certain specified number of your followers (to your own liking), so that you can really look like a Twitter King.

This mastermind (that I am not going reveal! Don't think of asking! I keep my word!) is in the early stages of conceptualizing a 'MAGIC GHOST BUTTON' that will add you followers without them even knowing it. It is really smart, because it only targets people that follow more than a thousand Twitter users, making it difficult to track its ghost clicking activity.

I am ready! But, why don't you have more than +600 followers? Well, some people don't practice what they preach. I only target educators that I want to connect with (Following a 1,000+) and perhaps learn something from them...


"(A Direct Message I seriously got from ....) So that I can be your Twitter Master ...(censored)... Read this & give me your unwavering devotion ;)"

What! You got to be kidding! I need to remove this dude as fast as possible from my list!

I have revealed this amazing secret, but you must keep in mind that your Twitter tweets must be juicy, attractive, and all-in-all relevant, which means more followers, more traffic to your site, and eventually big bucks. Also, please avoid automating all these annoying direct messages that lack human touch. Moreover, if you do so, this amazing secret might be exposed to the world. If you have to do it, at least personalize them. Here is an example, "Hi Yoda! I love your blog, especially that post that reveals the secret of the secret. I am honored to be connected with you! Let's learn from each other! Cheers! Also, forget my blog, it is really boring!"

Finally, when you embark on your important mission to get 100,000+ followers (Too small, think millions! Think bigger than big!), remember to do it fast! If you are interested in using the magic buttons I have mentioned, please contact me... which of course cannot be revealed here. Please meet me on the 'MOON' as soon as possible. Further directions will be given when you reach the moon.

I know that the Twitter community is incredible intelligent and they might expose this secret. But, Jack Dorsey and Biz Stone (or 3rd party developers) if you should ever read this post, please take this post seriously serious. Although, we have some filters to avoid this secret from happening (or do we?), I am foreseeing a Twitter learning space becoming a worse spam world than Hotmail was in the past (or still is? No idea, I am using Gmail! I wonder why!). Let's use our collective and creative intelligence to sort this out, so that this fictional story (or is it for real! You decide!) becomes ...

But then again, who cares about the number of followers you have! What really matters is the number of 'RETWEETS' you have (Topsy will tell you!), and how many times they are being clicked, and so on. Also,... (some other time). Pay me well, and I will reveal :)


Greg said...

sounds great, but where do i get these "magic buttons?"

lms training said...

That's very nicely presented post.

Zaid Ali Alsagoff said...

Hi Greg,

read carefully the post again, and then meet me on the moon to get these magic buttons. when you get to the moon, let me know :)



Anonymous said...

Where is the to get to the moon... :)

adrin said...

Like this blog.. and the information is pretty interesting.

Work from home

Kenny said...

where's the moon????

Anonymous said...

that's just crazy, wild, nutty, and wacky, dude!

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